Ahhh… It’s Over….

Yes, the big day has come and gone… and so have the kids. They boarded a shuttle on the 27^th and were off to St. George (Southern Utah) to spend their second week of Christmas vacation with grandma and grandpa. You know what that means?

I have the Wii all to myself all week long, Woo Hoo!!

My husband came over and played for awhile after dropping the kids off at the shuttle; I knocked him out cold in Boxing, I kicked his butt Bowling, and my band TOTALLY rocked harder in Guitar Hero. We had a fun time; he had even bought the kids a skiing game that you play standing on the Wii fit and using the controller and nunchuk as ski poles, and I gave that a shot, thus further proving there IS a reason I do not, and have never, and will never ski.

It was a lot of fun, and you know what? Today I CAN HARDLY MOVE. My shoulders, my upper arms, my back, my ass, my thighs, my knees – everything is stiff and sore. I got quite a workout… and I haven’t even tried the Wii Fit software yet!

I love that Wii. I did get it for the kids, but I guess it turned out to be a gift for myself as well, which works out, considering the only other gift I got was a Disturbed CD from my daughter. Way to go, kid, thanks for having my back. She rocks, she really does. I’m going to try to get tickets to Disturbed, they’re playing here at the end of January, and if I do I’m totally taking her. She’ll freak.

Still spending some time with the husband, overall it’s okay, I guess. I can’t believe he actually thinks my Pirate Enthusiasm is a bad influence on my children. This could be a deal-breaker, kids… if I can’t be me, I’m not going back, it’s just that simple. So now he says we can’t discuss it anymore until we see the counselor, because it could start a fight. Have I mentioned he still has to be the boss of everything, and tell me how to drive and where to turn in the town where I was born and raised? LOVE that…

It Happened….

Maybe it’s the fact that it’s almost upon us… maybe it’s the look of all the presents under the tree… maybe it’s the fact that my doctor just upped my antidepressants… but I have to admit, the Christmas Spirit has actually finally hit me. Just sauntered on up and whopped me upside the head, it did. Totally took me by surprise, too – I certainly wasn’t feeling very Christmas-y and wasn’t expecting to this year. Sure, I was putting on a brave face for the kids, but man, I sure wasn’t feeling it.

Then Saturday I went shopping with my husband, picked up the last few things I needed. He and I have been spending more time together and doing a lot of talking, and that’s been going well. We have decided to have the family Christmas together, and I feel really good about that.

Then I went home, and wrapped and wrapped… when I stood back and surveyed my little tree and all the gifts beneath it, I found myself saying a little prayer of thanks. I don’t know how I pulled it off, but I did. I did good for my kids this year, all by myself. I can’t wait to see their faces on Christmas morning when they see what’s in store.

I took a little gift upstairs to my neighbors, and was greeted with the news that their twin girls had been born Friday evening, healthy and beautiful. What an awesome Christmas gift for them! I can’t wait to see them, hold them… then hand them back….

I don’t know how it happened, or exactly when, or why. But sometime in the last few days, somehow, my heart got filled up. I had forgotten what that feels like, and I’m tearing up even as I write this, because it’s a good feeling and I don’t want it to go away. I feel like the Grinch when his heart grew two (or was it three? I can’t remember) sizes bigger all at once.

You know what? Life is good.

Gotta get it off my chest…

Okay, so it has been almost a week since Christmas, and I have been a good sport. I have kept my mouth shut, and smiled, and put my husband’s feelings first, just as I have for the last thirteen years that we have shared together during this happy freaking holiday time.
Last night at bowling, someone asked me, right in front of my husband, if I got anything good for Christmas.
I completely vapor-locked.
I had been un-prepared for this question.
“uh… I got, uh… let’s see…”
I started to sweat. The question hadn’t been WHAT had I gotten, it had been had I gotten anything GOOD?
My mind started madly reviewing the collection of this years’ gifts: cheap perfume, wooden spoons, the movie he had already bought me last year. I could feel my chest tightening at the same time the sublimated rage was beginning to fight it’s way to the surface.
For thirteen years, my husband has asked me to give him a list of the things I would like for… whatever. Christmas, birthdays, anniversaries, you name it. And for thirteen years, I have honed my list-writing skills. Never mind that I can never hope he will surprise me by thinking of something on his own, I have accepted long ago he’s not the type, and I live with it. But the best part is I write the list, the highly detailed list, and every year without fail, he proceeds to get me nothing on it. This year the list came complete with web sites and prices, he didn’t even have to leave his easy chair. What happened? He didn’t actually LOOK at the list until the 23rd, and then it was my fault he didn’t have time to order anything, I had ’set him up’ (even though I had given him the list more than 2 weeks prior). So what did he do? He went out and got me last-minute versions of things similar to what I asked for – at least, in his opinion. NOT in mine.
And the best part, was how I got to spend the rest of the day being asked, “I did good, right? Right? Right?”
Thank GOD for egg nog.
Ah well, there’s always next year!